I had the worst f*ing day of my life. I left my phone at home.
I am not being dramatic. This wasn’t an “intentional digital detox” that all my friends rave about doing while on vacation or “because they really needed it.” Well…Doesn’t that sound nice? And don’t I sound bitter?
No, the act of leaving my phone at home is about the worst thing I can do to myself — as a functioning Real Estate Agent & e-commerce store owner (or just as a human who runs a business). This. was. terrifying.
As I fumbled through the day sans-phone, I realized there were some pretty good take-away lessons I learned about myself in the process:
7:45am. Location: Union Station, Chicago
I’m at Union Station in Downtown Chicago and taking a train out to the suburbs to get to my Real Estate closing I had later that day. I do this often because us city folk only have one car & my husband wins that battle. So I am prepared like any Millennial: Mobile Ticketing.
I dig through my purse and this is the moment I realize my life ends. No phone.
Cool Kristi…. what the flip do you do now? These trains only leave once every 2 hours so I HAD to be on this one.
And this is where I learned my Lesson #1: I am really terrified of talking to strangers.
The best solution I could come up with on the fly was to ask another passenger if I could use their Mobile Ticketing App and buy my own one-way ticket on it.
But that means I would have to talk to someone. In public.
So I walk to the emptiest train car I can find (smallest audience) and announce, “Is anyone using Mobile Ticketing?”
One man said yes — I give him my whole speech about needing to use his phone to buy my ticket — and he immediately goes, “Um No.”
OMG. THIS WENT JUST AS POORLY AS I HAD IMAGINED.
So I start to walk away, and I am actually sweating because that conversation was not only mortifying but also not productive. I still needed a ticket.
He must’ve felt my desperation because right before I walked into another train car, he caved & let me use his phone. But the damage had already been done.
I’ll probably never talk to anyone other than a blood relative again in my life.
8:40am. Location: Lisle Train Station
The reality of leaving your phone at home means you have to be really organized ahead of time. For instance, in order for my mom to pick me up from the train station, I have to, ya know, tell her to pick me up from the train station.
I never take the same train (and I also miss a lot of trains….), so I will just text my mom from my seat before I actually leave Union Station.
Obvi that didn’t happen this particular morning.
So my brain goes to the worst possible outcomes & I try to navigate myself through them.
- What if she doesn’t show up?
- How far is it to the nearest phone? Wait…WHERE is the nearest phone?
- What if I call and she doesn’t answer?
- What if she is just late? How long do I wait before I know she’s not coming?
- Is there a solution to this problem that doesn’t involve talking to someone again?
I had about 4-5 of these worst-case scenarios worked out in my head when my train pulled into Lisle Train Station & my mom’s car was there waiting for me. Apparently my hubby had texted her & let her know my sans-phone situation, haha. He’s a smart boy.
And that brings me to Lesson #2: I am a really good problem solver.
Similar situations happened throughout the day and I had to play the “What If” game with myself constantly. Honestly I was a little impressed with how I just rolled with it & I learned that problem solving under pressure is my forte.
The thing about problem solving is you have to focus on the SOLVING, not the problem.
I could have easily just cried that my day was ruined (problem). And without a phone, these simple things in my daily routine became hard situations that caused unnecessary stress (problem). But instead I tried to focus on “What do I do?” (solution!!) and gamified my day that way.
11:00am. Driving to My Closing
LOL. This was a joke.
The amount of time that went into preparing to drive without a GPS is just silly. I probably spent 45 minutes mapping out & memorizing my 12 minute drive. I also left a half-hour early. I also printed out the directions.
I WAS SO SCARED.
What if I got lost? Took a wrong turn? Got a flat tire? (The What If Game was a big part of this, too).
Turns out that was all for shit because you can’t actually drive and read paper directions at the same time. How did we used to do this?
Lesson #3: I need to be better at trusting my instincts.
I way over-prepared, and honestly that just confused the F outta me. Driving to the other side of the town that I GREW UP IN should not have been that intense.
But I worked my anxiety up so much that I actually had to do breathing exercises in the car.
I rely so much on what my phone is able to do for me, that sometimes I forget that I can actually do those things myself, too.
A Day Without My Phone
I am NOT ending this post with some altruistic comments about how we should all live a little less connected to our phones. I don’t think that at all, actually. Not as a business owner.
But the reason I had such a hard time with this day is because I thrive in a hyper-organized environment and the reality is that my phone makes me feel on top of my shit.
I may be a little more on top of it than I give myself credit for, but technology has replaced the brain space I once gave to directions, to appointment windows, and even catching the right train. Those were just muscles I wasn’t used to using, therefore making my day infinitely harder than it needed to be.
What do you think your day would look like without your phone?